Bad news again...

Not a good day today.
I went to day to the Krippe, as I had been told we were selected and we had a contract ready to sign.
I was feeling so lucky, and just going there and wanted to ask a couple of things my husband thought about, like the Betreeungsschlüssel.
I got the contract in my hands, I was explained that per 12 kids they have always 2 adults and there are other people helping around, I was about to leave, and then I said "the contract is from June, isnt it?".
And NO, it was not. She told me that when I visited her she was meaning to start in September. I replied I did the Voranmeldung with starting date 1st of June, and I was assuming that if she called me is because she was looking for a kid from that date. It is January, and I know other Krippes call in April/May for September. I was also talking about leaving my kid with 6 months  - if this was in September, she would not be born yet, and she was with us!Anyway, a misunderstanding.
Then she took the contract from my hands, and said she had to rethink it. I told her I could read the contract meanwhile to see the rest of terms, but she did not give it back to me.

I am very tired as I am thinking in the Krippes since last March, since I saw a positive in the pregnancy test, and I am not sure if I will be closer to a Krippe contract than today. I do not understand why in all the registration forms they ask about entrance date, when is only possible to start in September in Munich (maybe they just want to know the year, as seems takes years to have a place!).
In the end because of this system, I understand women stop working, there is nowhere to leave the kids if you want to work again after six months. Even when you are willing to pay a fortune (you have no other option). This only happens in Germany aagh! Is this the way they have to ensure low rates of unemployment, making it impossible to the women to work once they have children? Because is not well seen that the man takes the leave - my husband taking three months is an exception.

Let's see if they find a solution as the person responsible of the Krippe told me that would phone me again. But I do not see it coming.

About Personalschlüssel and Kitas

I am VERY excited that we got selected for a Krippe. Here in Munich is like finding an apartment - takes lot of time, you have to pass an interview, it is very hard, you pay lot of money and still you feel so lucky. I still cannot believe it!
I got the phone call this morning, and tomorrow I will get the Vertrag (contract). I have one week to read it and then I will go to a contract discussion session.
I was so happy until my husband, who is more critical than me, asked me about the Personalschlüssel or Betreuungsschlüssel. In other words, the ratio of kids per adult. I am not sure, I had such a good feeling when I visited it, I like the philosophy, the premises, the atmosphere I saw, I like that I have found good reviews in Internet of other parents, that they take most of the kids full time, they have international environment, it is the only I have seen that would take a baby under 10 months and exactly the day we want, a great garden...why should I worry so much about that? am I too happy and my german man too cautious? If they are professional, I am sure they have a right rate of babies per adult.
So I have started a bit of research.
My first holy source of information are my girlfriends with babies in Kitas. In my home country this is very normal, and I got answers from three adults for 25 kids from 0-3 years old; other told me that one adult per 8 babies, etc. I asked to a friend in Munich who was visiting many Kitas and said it was normal to find two adults per class of 10-12 kids, or 3 if one is "praktikantin".
The second source was searching in other websites and appear that the ratio in Germany is 4,8 - in Bayern 4.
I will ask tomorrow what is the exact ratio for mine. I hope this is not a problem for us to sign a contract.

A bit of progress

I am very happy because I see a bit of progress! One of the Kitas asked me for an interview. I spent one hour there. I visited the premises, learned about how they work, what is offered for kids and parents etc. Overall I had a very good impression. I was also asked many questions: where do I work, where does my partner work, what we think about general things, etc. The host told me that will give her feedback to the pedagogue of the centre and they will come back to us in a couple of weeks if we get a place.
I liked a lot the place. For me the main things were that there are children with international environment and that most of the kids are full day in the Kita. In Germany is very usual that some kids are only 3-4 hours in the morning and a few stay longer in the day. Many people have told me "Ohh it is so sad when only a couple of kids stay abandoned in the afternoons in the Kitas". Well, in this Kita most of the kids stay full time and there is a full day program so moms are Rabenmutters like me, which is a plus! They are also one of the few Kitas that take kids from months, so they have experience with them. And the whole concept of their philosophy, their activities, the garden, the rooms...also convinced me.
Lets see what happens! Fingers crossed!
As I believe it is absolutely fine to look for daycare for my baby, we shared it with our families. My husband and me explained together to my family in law about it. Then there were a couple of comments, only directed to me:

• "Do you enjoy being with your baby?". What question is this? So do they think I want a full day because I do not enjoy my baby? I enjoy being with my baby more than anything else! But I have my reasons!
• Other relative started hugging the baby: "oooh I am so sorry for her...she is going to feel lonely and get sick....ooh I am so sad" (and repeated the "I am so sad" like 10 times - what a drama queen).

I will soon have a new post of things you should never say to a working mom!
Anyway I am just focusing on my baby, on how happy she is going to be, how much she is going to learn, and I keep looking my phone to see if the Kita phones me to confirm the place!

Kitas!

When I found out I was pregnant, I started registering for Kitas, or daycare for the baby before she is 3 years old. This was in March 2014, and I am looking for a place from June 2015. I still did not get any answer at all, and I am afraid I do not have any chance before September 2015, which it would be fine.
In total we are registered in 18 places in Munich:

• In the state kitas. This is almost impossible, we were told that they have over 1000 kids applying for 24 places. The price changes: if the family income is less thank 15k euros, it is for free; but if it is more than 60k, it is around 421 euros. More information: http://www.muenchen.de/rathaus/Stadtverwaltung/Referat-fuer-Bildung-und-Sport/Kindertageseinrichtungen/gebueren-buchungszeiten.html 
• Caritas Kita. This seems also very difficult. The day I went to register were so many women there, and when I asked how long was the waiting list they just laughed at me. The link to find the closest Caritas Krippe is http://www.caritas-nah-am-naechsten.de/Kindertagesstaetten/Kindertageseinrichtungen-Muenchen/Page011263.aspx. 
• Private Kitas. When I have been visiting them there were only a couple of other mothers, but they did not give us also any hint if we would have a place or not, or how long is the waiting list. There are a few around us. The prices are around 800 euros, including food and in some cases diapers.
• Elterninitiativen. These are daycare places led by the parents of the babies. I found them in this website http://www.elterninitiativen-muenchen.de/, but most of them are for kids that are over a year and a half or two years old. Parents are expected to have responsibilities, such as managing the waiting list, organising events of the Kita, going shopping, etc. Around 6 or 7 hours per month are expected. I think this is very interesting. The price is more expensive than the state kitas, but cheaper than the private ones - around 500 euros.

I contacted them this week again, and only a couple of them answered saying that will contact us around April-May if we are selected, and starting date would be september/october...

I have to start thinking in plan B: Tagesmutter. I will focus in finding a Tagesmutter next week.

Trying to find a Kita!

I had already heard that it was a challenge to find a Kita in Munich. The Kita is the daycare for babies until they go to Kindergarden with 3 years. When I found out I was pregnant, I started to register for different Kitas around my place. I did it literally as soon as I knew I was pregnant, so not even my mother knew she was going to be upgraded to Grandmother, and my future baby was already registered in many Kitas. I did this in March, and my baby was born in November. Today is January, and I still do not have any answer that I will have a place at all.
One of the challenges is that there are not so many, or there are many that do not take babies younger than 1 year old or 2 years old. There are also some that only offer service until 3pm, which is not compatible with our jobs. The waiting list is also very long, it can take up to two years, isn't it incredible? This only makes sense in this country because many women take two years of maternity leave. In my case, I was registered in March 2014, and I want to find something from June 2015, which is after one year and three months and my baby will be more than six months old, but I don't have much hope to find anything to be honest! In all the Kitas I have been told that there is a long queue, that they cannot promise me there will be a place and so on.
The prices change. The public Kita was the cheapest. I already forgot the price, because I can only remember that we were told that they have 24 places and over 1000 registrations for next year, so it would be a miracle (and what a pity because it is so close to us!). The other Kitas are around 500 to 800 euros per month, and food can be around 80 to 100 euros extra per month. So yes, I believe that opening a Kita is a great business in Munich. I guess that if they were more expensive, they would also be full and with a long waiting list, as there are not enough.
In summary, I think that apart that is not well seen, it is a big challenge to go back to work because there is not enough daycare. It is also very expensive, so many families may think that does not compensate to pay that if the salaries are not high enough. I have no idea how I would solve our situation, my strategy is to start calling and writing to all the Kitas again from today until I get a positive answer! Fingers crossed! There are other alternatives: Tagesmutter or to hire a nanny, and I will talk about those in the next posts.

Happy New Year 2015

Happy new year 2015! 2014 was amazing and exciting, as I was pregnant and my little baby was born in November. I would like to make my New Year's resolutions, first time in my life that I write them.

• My baby is my priority: I want to continue reading lots of books and forums and learning how to be a better mom. I want to learn how to stimulate her each day and the best way to play with her. I promise to organise my life around her. 
• I promise to take care of the relationship with my partner. I promise to keep finding special moments for ourselves, like every week we should have a special dinner, open a nice bottle of wine... I promise not to complain about my family in law if they do not help us with the baby and just accept the cultural differences. 
• I promise to take care of myself. I want to lose all the weight of the pregnancy. I have to take care of myself so I do not look like the fat zombie I look now. I promise to go back to the gym at least twice per week once I am allowed again. 
• I promise to travel with her to my home country a couple of times, and keep her in touch with my family through video-calls. I promise to find time in the week to keep in touch with my friends back home.

And what are my wishes for 2015?

• First of all health. Health for family and friends. And health for my little baby, I am always so worried about her health since I saw a positive in the pregnancy test! So far she has been doing great, and I really hope she continues like this next year.
• Of course I also hope that this new year brings lots of love. I have a little new person who I love so much. I also hope that the love with my partner stays at least at the same level, and the stress and sleepless nights do not affect our relationship.
• If I start thinking of practical wishes, and since I am writing a blog that is called "working mom in Germany", I hope that this year I can manage going back to work with spending quality time with my baby. I need first to find childcare. I hope I can solve the situation in the first months of the year. I hope my baby enjoys it. I hope my husband and me are able to manage our new schedule. 
• I hope that in 2015 I will do lots of thing with my baby. We will play a lot together, she will develop fine, learn to walk and we travel with her and she learns a lot this year.

Welcome, 2015!!